My Wife the Empress is Becoming Frightening



The First Night’s Story is a Long One

Chapter 1

The emperor’s husband is an idiot.

It was the common perception among most of the human nations, except for one rural kingdom.

Ah, to protect the emperor’s honor, let me clarify that the current imperial emperor is a woman.

And a remarkable cross-dressing woman who drew her sword and beheaded the previous emperor to get her revenge.

It’s just that I, her husband, am called a subpar man, so I hope there are no misunderstandings.

“Um, Sir Isaac…”

While lost in delusions, not knowing who I was talking to, the young lady of the House of… What was it again?

Anyway, Lady Y was looking at me after changing her clothes.

Her face still seemed flushed.

“It’s time for you to go back now. I had a carriage prepared for you, remember?”

I said this, but it makes me feel like trash. But we had agreed to do this from the start.

So I’m just a cheating man faithfully fulfilling my promise with the woman I cheated with.

Hmm. I’m still trash.

“Sir Isaac, um, that is, I mean…”

Of course, if I tell her to leave, she won’t just quietly go. It’s not that these women want something in return.

Or rather, they do want something in return. They want assurances of when we’ll meet again, if we can meet again.

I handed her the ring I had prepared in advance.

“Go carefully.”

“Yes!”

The noble lady Y, satisfied with the ring, planted a kiss on my face. I don’t mind, but I hope she doesn’t overdo it.

My beastmaker barely settled down again.

To avoid making the carriage driver I called wait too long, I gently pushed her away. Surprised by her own actions, Lady Y hurried out of the room.

“Hmm. Not bad, but going to a brothel is still easier.”

After making sure Lady Y had left, I lit a new incense stick. While the ring had some value, one ring didn’t promise another meeting.

In the first place, I never said anything about meeting again. I just gave her the ring.

The women I slept with outside of proper relationships all wanted some kind of memento. So I went to a jeweler and bought a bunch of similar-looking rings and accessories in bulk.

If I give them that, the women are satisfied and leave. Noble lady or maid, monastery sister, it’s all the same.

They get what they want and are satisfied, and I don’t have to bother.

A happy ending with benefits for both sides.

“…”

Damn. I really am trash.

[Knock. Knock.]

“Pardon me.”

Without waiting for permission, the door opened and some of the imperial palace maids came into the room.

It was a familiar routine, so I didn’t have any complaints. The maids also seemed used to it as they changed the sheets and tidied up.

In an instant, they cleaned up the messy room including the bed, then took the dirty linens and left.

All except one. The one who seemed to lead the other maids looked distinctly young.

“…”

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

I wondered if I had some fur stuck on my face, but that didn’t seem to be the case. Come to think of it, my personal maid Haria always looked at me with contempt.

How sad.

“You need a bath.”

“Are you going to wash me yourself?”

“…”

“It’s fine. I’ll do it myself. Thanks for the offer.”

I wiped myself earlier with a towel, but traces and smells wouldn’t disappear with just that. I was planning to bathe after the maids left anyway.

I’m well aware from my time on the battlefield how important hygiene is.

“So stop looking at me like that. If the empress’s husband develops some weird hang ups, who’s going to take responsibility?”

“Understood.”

Haria replied and moved to leave, but I still had business with her.

“Wait a moment.”

“…What is it?”

When I suddenly called out to her, she looked at me with tremendous suspicion. If we were on the streets of the capital, that look alone might get her hauled away by the public order corps.

Of course I knew she was busy, but my business was also very important.

“I’m hungry, so bring me something to eat.”

“…”

I gave her a look saying of course I’m hungry after that, you know? After that, the faint light in Haria’s eyes completely disappeared.

She briefly left and came back with a plate full of hardtack, dumped it on the table, and left again.

I don’t know how she knew I like hardtack, but I appreciate it.

However…

“If I ask for water, she’ll get mad, right…?”

No matter who I am, I can’t eat without water.

—

It was three months ago.

Contrary to the prejudiced assessments of the public, Isaac von Meyers had a courteous personality. Despite being royalty, he was friendly to anyone as long as they did not first act rudely to him.

In other words, he did not hesitate to be rude in return if they were rude first, regardless of who they were.

With his recklessly optimistic personality that never considered the consequences, he caused countless legendary anecdotes that devastated the dignity of kings and ministers. But those who knew him would unanimously describe Isaac von Meyers as a warm man who loved his family.

When he realized his second brother, born right after him, was exceptionally intelligent, he blithely handed over the position of crown prince.

It was something only Isaac could have done.

In fact, he cherished his family dearly. Isaac was the eldest, with two younger brothers and a youngest sister below him.

Stories of royal and imperial families in other nations poisoning each other and sending assassins as greetings were completely foreign to them.

So with a tilt of his head, he asked his father, who was also the King of Meyers Kingdom:

“I thought you were still too young, but could it be Father has entered your second childhood?”

The Meyers Kingdom was the smallest continental nation located at the far eastern end of the human countries. In terms of area alone, it was slightly smaller than Zeedo, the capital of the mighty Blatha Empire, the largest nation on the continent.

Despite its measly size, it had no significant resources. The only thing it had was the heteromorphic races endlessly invading from even further east beyond the kingdom’s eastern border when they got bored.

As a result, Meyers Kingdom had no conflicts with its neighboring countries. From the neighboring countries’ perspective, even if they conquered Meyers Kingdom, they would just inherit the wars with the heteromorphic races.

Above all, they would have to accept considerable damage themselves in order to fight against the battle-crazed lunatics made that way by the heteromorphic races.

And throughout his life, Isaac had always been at the forefront of those lunatics.

As soon as Isaac reached the age to wield a sword, he rushed to the battlefield. He was no genius of tactics or strategy, but he was clearly a genius of might.

From then to now in his thirties, he had lived practically on the battlefield.

He only briefly stayed in the royal castle for special occasions like his family’s birthdays or the country’s festivals. And even then, never for over a month.

His visit today was also to see off a younger brother going on a long trip, since who knew when they would meet again. But instead of a greeting, his father, the current King of Meyers, said something unthinkable.

“You will be going to the Blatha Empire.”

It wasn’t even a proposal or request. It was simply a notification that the decision had been made. A dull shock hit the back of his head unlike anything he had felt even on the battlefield, but Isaac barely kept his mind together and asked back:

“Why do I have to go?”

“Your second brother is the crown prince now. It was you who decided that.”

“No, I mean… wasn’t my third brother supposed to go to the empire?”

“I know. It’s fortunate you cherish your brothers so much.”

It was a strange conversation.

Normally, Isaac would have realized some problem came up and the situation changed. He likely could have guessed what that problem was.

But perhaps due to the great shock, Isaac’s mind stopped working. Seeing his usually unflappable eldest son so flustered, the King of Meyers felt apologetic and sighed before confessing:

“…Your third brother ran away.”

“Where the hell is that punk right now?!”

That day, Isaac felt the need to beat his brother with a rod for the first time.

—

Marianne King Blatha was an amazing woman.

She was so insignificant among the imperial family that no one would have known she was a member of it. At the mere age of 17, she accomplished the feat of conquering the mightiest empire on the continent.

Ah, does saying she screwed the empire sound too crude?

Let’s say that after gracefully separating the previous emperor’s head and body, she thoroughly massacred the existing imperial family from elders to young children before situating her buttocks on the throne.

That’s a bit better.

Anyway, I’ve heard the previous emperor was an utter disaster, as much as I can know being stuck on the border.

Every day faithful vassals died and the empire’s ponds filled with the blood of that day’s ill-fated traitors as he engaged in extravagance and debauchery.

People naturally go crazy when they gorge on something alone. It’s true for eating food, and ruling a nation.

Thanks to the previous emperors’ legendary achievements, the empire retained its wealth even during the previous emperor’s reign, but that fool greedily indulged in it all alone.

Naturally, this angered the various nobles and top-ranking officials unable to partake. Eventually, they decided to overthrow the previous emperor.

“But she was the one who instantly unified those quarreling over who would eat how much through her abilities, proved herself, and became their leader to take the previous emperor’s head and sit on the throne herself – that’s what I know about you.”

“Correct. You’ve studied quite a bit.”

Today was the monthly tea time between husband and wife.

From noble mtl dot com

Of course, like everything, unforeseen circumstances often led to postponements, so this was the first time I properly saw my wife’s face since our wedding ceremony three months ago.

“But the emperor’s position required a great deal of care. You can control enemies through force but you can’t rule the citizens that way. However much you try to dominate through fear, you can’t eliminate their deeper resentment.”

Despite being over 10 years younger than me, she spoke very maturely. I should agree here.

“That’s right.”

“….Where are you looking?”

“Your chest.”

“Raise your head this instant.”

Still attached to my neck, I quickly raised my head. But my wife looked at me with utter disdain.

I, Isaac, may not remember faces well, but I remember bodies well. I remember the plump chest and buttocks and slender waist.

Even so…

“That’s too much. I’m your husband.”

“I said we could speak casually, not forget manners.”

Her icy blue eyes told me the first night was still a distant story.