I am Vardy

How can we keep Rooney from chattering?

Of course, I just took a knife and wiped the little Rooney, to ensure that this guy can't go out in the future.

But the question is, isn't it a bit too much to directly ask Rooney to switch to women's football?

Many people ask what should they do if they suddenly become a woman one day?

The answer is, let the brothers have a good time first!

But Vardy feels that he probably won't be able to deal with Rooney who has become a woman...

So this idea can only be deeply buried in my heart, I really can't do it like this.

Sneaking back into the locker room, Vardy started rummaging through boxes and boxes and found Rooney's cell phone.

With one operation, he saved his number in Rooney's phone as another name, and the owner of this name is the little nurse who is now having a hot fight with Rooney.

After thinking about it, Vardy felt wrong again, didn't he include himself in it?

So Vardy quickly changed it back, and then changed the name of Ferdinand stored in Rooney's mobile phone to the name of the little nurse.

Well, this has nothing to do with me!

Then Vardy took out Ferdinand's phone, edited a text message and sent it to Rooney.

"Honey, I'm feeling hot all over and I need someone to give me a warm hug! I'll be waiting for you at the Lowry Hotel in room 409 tonight. You don't have to answer my texts or call me, I just want to be alone Waiting for you quietly!"

send!

delete!

Hidden merit and fame!

After doing all this, Vardy left the locker room with a snicker.

At the end of the training, the Manchester United players went back to the locker room together. Vardy's attention was always on Rooney, and he wanted to see how Rooney would react.

Rooney didn't know that someone was watching secretly. He put on his clothes and took out his mobile phone, only to find that someone had sent a text message.

After reading the text message, Rooney seemed to explode.

His whole body exuded a strong hormonal aura, and his flushed face fully betrayed his inner thoughts.

Others didn't know what happened like Vardy, and looked at Rooney curiously.

Rooney hurriedly put his phone into his pocket, pretending to have nothing to do.

After everyone left, Rooney came over to hold Vardy.

"Jamie, come with me for a look. Tonight I'm going to wag my tail again. Don't envy me!" Rooney's fart made Vardy have the urge to take off his shoes and slap him in the face.

After finally getting rid of Rooney, Vardy started the next step in the plan.

Find a famous gay gay bar and hire two gay-looking dudes.

"The task of the two of you tonight is to serve my friend well. Of course, he is a little timid and a little shy. If he struggles and resists, you must not take it seriously, because it is just because he is embarrassed!"

After finishing speaking, Vardy took out two dozen pounds and handed them to the two gay guys respectively.

"Uh, don't forget to bring props, he likes stimulation the most!"

Before leaving, Vardy did not forget to give a special reminder.

Little fat man, don't blame me, I'm doing it for your own good!

Vardy wanted to go home and wait for the news, but he still couldn't restrain his curiosity, so he simply ran to the hotel next door and opened another room to watch the show up close.

On the other side, Rooney did a cool styling all afternoon, but there is not much room for improvement no matter how you clean it up, and the trend of getting less and less hair can't be concealed at all...

He was very excited all afternoon, and the strong sense of anticipation made him feel ecstatic, wishing that the night would come earlier.

Resisting his excitement, Rooney came to the Laurie Hotel just as the lights were on.

Along the way, he was imagining what he would see when the door opened.

The dim candlelight reflected the charming atmosphere, and the little nurse carefully prepared a romantic candlelight dinner?

Or the little nurse leaning against the door in sexy lingerie and staring at herself affectionately?

Or maybe the little nurse called her sister to play a more exciting game?

 …

OMG, can't think anymore!

If you think about it any more, you will come out, so you don't have to go into the room anymore!

Rubbing his chest and trying to calm himself down, Rooney smiled like a gentleman, and then gently knocked on the door.

But he never expected that all his fantasies came to naught, and when the door opened, two gay guys in fishnet outfits appeared in front of him.

"Uh, that, I'm sorry, I went to the wrong room!" Rooney said coldly, pretending to be calm, then turned around and wanted to leave.

"You're right, come in!" The two homosexuals took Rooney by one arm, and pulled him into the room, thinking while pulling, the employer was right, he was really shy, it's about this time I'm so embarrassed!

After Rooney was pulled into the room, he was completely confused. Let's not talk about the two guys who look gay at first glance. What is this room?

Whips, candles, chains, sex suits...

This Nima is the filming scene, right?

"Well, I really went wrong, I'm sorry, you go on, I wish you a good time!" Rooney said very brokenly.

But the problem is that he can't get rid of the two gay guys no matter what, this feeling makes him very bad.

"Don't be shy, since we have collected the money, I promise you will have a good time tonight!" One of the homosexuals touched Rooney's chest, which made Rooney's skin crawl.

"By the way, I really didn't know that the big star Rooney also liked this bite. If I knew it was you, I would definitely make you ecstasy even if I don't need money!"

Rooney felt as if he had fallen into a pit of fire. If he couldn't get rid of these two gay guys, he might lose his ass tonight!

At this time, he still had his final fantasy, all of this was a deliberate prank by the little nurse. When he was most desperate, the little nurse would suddenly appear, and then the two of them would start their passion again.

But the problem is, I struggled and was stripped of my shirt, why didn't the little nurse come out?

Nima, I feel so sore and limp all over, my whole body is going to shudder when Mei is touched by a gay guy, and goosebumps fall all over the ground.

Struggling in every possible way to explain that he is not gay, but these two things don't listen at all.

Does this have to be at your own pace?

Rooney knew that if he didn't come up with the last trick, his first fame might be lost here!

So, Rooney resorted to his big move, posing as a boxer, and a set of combined punches brought the two gays down.

After getting dressed and quickly fled the hotel, got into the car and stepped on the gas pedal to the end, Rooney swore that he would never come to Laurie Hotel again!

Parking the car on a deserted street, Rooney tremblingly took out his phone and called the little nurse.

However, this little nurse was not the little nurse he wanted, but Ferdinand who was trying out the little nurse outfit at home.

"Why did you lie to me?" Rooney said with a cry in his tone, which really frightened him just now.

Ferdinand answered the phone in a daze, when did he lie to Rooney?

"Uh, did you make a mistake? How did I lie to you?" Ferdinand asked puzzled while taking off his little nurse outfit.

But here Rooney heard Ferdinand's voice and almost jumped out of the car.

Damn, why did that bastard Ferdinand hold the little nurse's phone?

"Why are you with her? What are you two doing?" Rooney hurriedly asked.

Ferdinand was disturbed by Rooney. He was already very upset, but he was inexplicable by Rooney's question.

"If you feel mentally abnormal, you should go see a psychiatrist!" After finishing speaking, Ferdinand hung up the phone.

Rooney also felt that something was wrong, so he quickly checked his phone, only to find that there were two nurses' phone numbers saved in his phone.

Who the hell did this prank?

Rooney wants to cry but has no tears!

I almost got fucked up, you know?

Judging from Ferdinand's appearance just now, it wasn't this guy who did it, because this guy doesn't have such a brain circuit at all!

Look at this modus operandi, a bit like Vardy!

asshole!

I'm not done with you!

 …

In the end, this matter was over. Vardy refused to admit it, and Rooney, who had no evidence, had nothing to do. Besides, Rooney is no longer Vardy's opponent, and threats of force will not work at all.

Besides, Rooney won't publicize his embarrassment everywhere. People didn't know about it, but everyone didn't know about his investigation with great fanfare!

Vardy secretly laughed very happily. It is impossible for you to find evidence unless you ask those two gay guys. The question is, does Rooney dare to go?

This incident really surprised Rooney a lot. Among other things, he will definitely not go out to fool around during this period of time. Even when paying the public food, he feels a little powerless, because he can always think of the two basics in fishnet suits. guy......

In fact, Vardy also felt that it was a bit too much to cheat Rooney like this, but Rooney is just too horny, and he doesn't know how to restrain himself if he doesn't deal with him.

And Rooney is at most frightened, not really lost, because Vardy knows that the two gay guys are definitely not Rooney's opponents. If Rooney really wants to resist, they are not enough for Rooney to warm up.

Of course, if Rooney doesn't want to resist, then... Vardy has nothing to say!

The big deal is to wait until after the Champions League final and just compensate him by yourself. Two if one fails, three if two fail. Vardy doesn't believe that Rooney can deal with ten in one night...

But what Vardy didn't expect was that after Rooney became a victim of his own creativity, he actually stole his own creativity and started to cheat others.

On the first day, Ferdinand was fooled, and the goods flew to London overnight, but Mao didn't see a single one;

The next day, Fletcher fell for it, and the guy plunged headlong into a gay dating bar, barely getting out;

On the third day, Brown...

If it wasn't for the upcoming match against West Ham United, Rooney would have dared to lie to Ferguson!

This is a disaster!

Well, Vardy is also Rooney's target, but the little fat man is a bit stupid, he actually asked himself out with an unfamiliar phone number, Vardy didn't even believe a single cell.

Fight IQ with brother, you are still young!

If you don't want to face ten fags next time, then I think you better be honest and don't jump like this!