I am Vardy

Golden grain meal is also called feces banquet. I don’t know if it is the traditional culture of the island country. Anyway, this thing is very expensive, more expensive than eating at a Michelin three-star restaurant!

After listening to the introduction by the hostess, Vardy smiled so heartlessly.

How is it, President, does it taste good?

Rooney's expression was extremely weird, and when he thought that Ronaldo had eaten the whole plate just now, he couldn't help but spit out all the water he just drank.

On the other hand, Ronaldo seems to be obsessed with the fragrance of girls in kimonos, and he didn't pay attention to what they said. He was wondering, how did the young lady leave?

Hey, no!

What did that wretched waiter just say?

How many girls have been carefully selected, and how many girls will be chefs?

No, I vaguely heard the word excrement?

In an instant, the entire stomach, large intestine, small intestine, duodenum... the entire digestive system was churning wildly, vomiting spasmodically!

But the problem is, it took a long time to digest this thing, even if half of it was spit out, wouldn't the other half remain in the stomach!

And Vardy felt that since he had already entered through the mouth once, wouldn't it be more disgusting to come out from the mouth again now?

Ronaldo is still too young!

Rooney couldn't help giving Vardy a thumbs up. He admired Vardy's imagination and execution ability, and he actually gave Ronaldo such a hand!

Not to mention a guy like Ronaldo who seems to be a bit of a clean freak, even if he is a normal person, he probably has vomiting and diarrhea by now!

Vardy shook his head modestly, saying that this is nothing!

It's really nothing, because this is not the end!

The task must be linked together.

He ate the golden grain meal without any precautions, and then told Ronaldo the truth, which made Ronaldo collapse.

But this is just the beginning, and often when you already know it, you are allowed to continue to implement it, which is the most frustrating and unbearable thing for you.

Cristiano Ronaldo,

are you ready?

The fun is about to begin!

"Water, I want water..." Ronaldo stretched out his hand weakly, extremely weak, and felt as if his whole body was terminally ill!

Rooney felt sorry for him, and handed Ronaldo a glass of water sympathetically.

Ronaldo rinsed his mouth and poured it into his stomach. After a long time, he finally felt refreshed.

At this time, the gaze he looked at Vardy was hard to describe in words.

If it could be summed up in one sentence, it would probably be——you wait, I won’t kill you and I will follow your surname, Guisun!

But before Ronaldo could stand up for a while, Vardy clapped his hands again and called the waiter.

Ronaldo's eyes widened in horror, his heart beating frighteningly.

It should be that Vardy is going to check out, right?

But obviously, he thinks Vardy too kindly.

If you don't take this opportunity to play tricks on Ronaldo, wouldn't you be too sorry for your funny name.

"My request to you is to finish the last two dishes. Now that you have eaten the penultimate dish, the real finale will be served soon! Please wait patiently!" Vardy smiled innocently to C Road.

besides?

Ronaldo didn't stand up alone, and almost didn't fall a shit.

Rooney looked at Vardy with admiration, and couldn't help asking: "How much does this set cost?"

Vardy downplayed it, and said with a nonchalant expression: "This is the most expensive banquet in the island country, and it's probably less than 100,000 pounds for a meal! It's a higher-end meal than the women's body! You know, I made an appointment one month in advance. Otherwise, such a good thing would not be our turn at all.”

Hearing Vardy's words, Ronaldo was about to cry, it's worth noting this good thing.

Rooney looked at Vardy adoringly. Compared to being able to play, it seems that everyone is no match for Vardy!

At this moment, the door of the room was opened, and the waiter came in again, thinking of a young girl.

Even if this young girl is cuter and more kawaii than the one just now, Ronaldo's eyes are already full of fear, and he is no longer the lewd look just now.

But this time, the girl and the hostess were not introduced. Vardy, as the narrator, began to explain.

"There are two ways to eat the golden grain meal. The first is the plate you just ate, and the second is more complicated!"

"The customer will first choose one of the girls, and then sign a contract with her, and set the taste of shit, such as cantaloupe, durian, tomato and so on."

"The selected girl will only eat green vegetables for the first month, and nothing else; after one month, she will start to eat the flavor on the contract, such as cantaloupe, and eat cantaloupe for three meals a day. I don’t eat anything.”

"At the last banquet, a large round table was placed in the center of the room, and a stool was placed on the round table. There was a hole in the middle of the stool, and a plate was placed under the stool. The girls sat on the stool, and the guests sat by the table."

"When the girl pooped out and dropped it on the plate for the first time, the guests can start to enjoy the most delicious and original dishes with a spoon."

 …

Before Vardy finished speaking, the eyes of Rooney and Ronaldo were straight.

They never imagined that there is such an incredible food culture in the island country.

Should this be described as elegant, or is it too vulgar?

"This is the last dish I prepared for you. I specially picked the lemon flavor for you. You know, lemons are not very delicious when eaten raw, so I added a lot of money. You must not disappoint my kindness ah!"

Vardy looked at Ronaldo with a smile, admiring Ronaldo's embarrassment that he was so horrified that he wanted to kneel down and beg for mercy.

In fact, Vardy was really merciful. In fact, what he wanted to choose for Ronaldo at first was not lemon flavor, but shit flavor...

It's just that the girl didn't agree with anything!

Ronaldo really wanted to kneel down to Vardy. Originally, he thought that the golden grain meal just now was already the most terrifying pity, but he didn't expect that there would be even more ruthless ones now.

He didn't know what the raw materials of those golden balls were before, so he ate them as soon as he finished eating them. At most, he was so sick after knowing the truth just now.

But now I clearly know what I want to eat, and it is the most primitive excrement with no additives and no processing, even if it is a girl's, even if it is prepared strictly according to a series of procedures, it will not change a single thing after all. Question - shit or shit!

"Jamie, I beg you, can we change the request, don't worry, I will pay for this meal!" Ronaldo couldn't help but begged Vardy.

Vardy is also considering this issue, is he a bit too much?

If it were him who was cheated like this, then he would definitely be able to work hard!

But presumably the adaptability of Europeans and Americans should be stronger than myself, a person with a Chinese soul!

Do you want to let Ronaldo go?

Looking at the lovely and pitiful Ronaldo, Vardy couldn't help but soften his heart.

Well, consider it a charity!

Just as Vardy was about to open his mouth to spare Ronaldo, he heard the girl speak suddenly.

"\u0026amp;amp;...%￥#￥%...\u0026amp;amp;\u0026amp;amp;"

What do you mean?

Vardy didn't understand, saying that he only knew those few sentences in Japanese.

Ronaldo and Rooney don't understand either.

So the three of them all looked at the waiter.

The waiter bowed deeply, and translated in English: "Three gentlemen, please start eating as soon as possible, our girl is almost unable to hold back..."

The three of them rolled their eyes at the same time, feeling extremely funny.

I really don't know how those high-end islanders enjoy this delicious meal, well, it's really hard to understand.

"Then this..."

Vardy just opened his mouth to bypass Ronaldo, but was suddenly interrupted by Rooney.

"I think it's very interesting, I want to try it, Jamie, don't let Ronaldo eat it all, let me eat some too!"

Rooney looked at the girl's butt with great interest, and suddenly said eagerly.

In an instant, Vardy felt bad all over.

Damn, there are still people who ask for shit!

He has always known that Rooney has a strong taste beyond ordinary people, which can be seen from his liking for the aunt who still has charm.

But Vardy has only now realized that he still underestimated the extent of Rooney's heavy taste.

Rooney is still eager to try this shit feast?

"Brother, you are my own brother, I don't want it anymore, I'll give you all to eat!" Ronaldo hugged Rooney's thigh and didn't let go.

Vardy also had a bewildered expression. He originally spent so much money and wanted to spare Ronaldo temporarily. The waste of this expensive meal was wasted.

Unexpectedly, Rooney actually wanted to be a catcher to complete this shit feast.

Vardy said that he was convinced, and he couldn't find a better evaluation for Rooney!

Naturally, someone volunteered, and Vardy will not discourage his enthusiasm. Anyway, he was just watching a movie, and Ronaldo couldn't be fooled. It's the same when watching Rooney eat shit now.

So, Vardy sat aside with Ronaldo, quietly waiting for Rooney to stage the good show that can't be watched directly.

The girl in the kimono sat shyly on the chair, covered her buttocks with the tail curtain, and began the process of "serving food".

Slap!

A piece of orange fell on the center of the plate. Vardy held back his gag and wanted to learn more, but before he could see clearly, Rooney, who had a quick hand and a quick eye, had already spooned it into his mouth.

Looking at Rooney who closed his eyes and chewed slowly like a gourmet tasting food, Vardy wanted to ask, is this stuff chicken-flavored and crunchy?

Enough is enough!

If Colleen knew that Rooney was eating shit in the island country, she probably wouldn't bring Rooney to kiss her when she went back.

Tai Nima is disgusting!

But no matter what, the result was very good. Originally, Vardy planned to tease Ronaldo, but this time it was good. Among the three people, two of them tasted the golden grain meal, although one was passive and the other was active.

The goal has also been achieved. I believe that Ronaldo will not dare to provoke himself in the future. In the future, Ronaldo will have to call him big brother when he meets him.

After the meal, Ronaldo almost had no strength left. He originally wanted to experience life, forget it, let’s go back to the hotel!

However, Rooney obviously had a good time, came to the state, and yelled that he had to go to the next show, but was forced back to the hotel by Vardy.

Back at the hotel, the teammates were puzzled to see the three people in completely different states.

Vardy is fine, Ronaldo has almost half his life left, as if he has been squeezed dry, while Rooney is refreshed, as if the long-dried flowers have finally been nourished and irrigated, and they are blooming again.

Is this style of painting a bit reversed? Who is the attacker and who is the victim?