I am Quaresma

In the middle of the week, Arsenal ushered in the fifth round of the Champions League group stage at home. Their opponent was Hamburg, which had only scored one point in the previous four rounds.

Speaking of which, the Hamburg team is really more ambitious than paper. I thought it could make a bloody way in the group stage. After all, apart from Arsenal, there are no traditional giants in the group, even if they won the Champions League three seasons ago. The champion Porto has long since faded away. In their view, they are qualified to compete for the qualification.

However, the reality gave them a slap in the face—the slap was so bad that they almost had a concussion!

Losing to Arsenal in the first round, losing to CSKA Moscow in the second round, finally drawing with Porto in the third round, but being beaten by Porto in the fourth round, the German team has lost everything they can.

Originally, the Bundesliga is in an extremely difficult situation now. The European War points may even be surpassed by Ligue 1. If you don’t work hard, even the Portuguese Super League may surpass the Bundesliga. At that time, the Bundesliga will not be counted as the top five leagues.

Under such circumstances, Hamburg entered the Champions League, but achieved such an embarrassing result, which simply made the Bundesliga worse. Those Bundesliga fans have not scolded Hamburg for a while.

Anyway, there was absolutely no chance of qualifying, and fortunately Hamburg let go of the burden. In any case, even if they played six rounds in the group stage, they still had to win a victory, right?

If they are out in embarrassment without a win, then Hamburg may really become a street rat in the Bundesliga.

However, obviously going to the Emirates Stadium is not a good opportunity for them to score points. Facing an Arsenal that needs to lock in the top spot of the group in this game, they have no chance no matter how you look at it.

So, be honest, don't jump too much, if you piss off Arsenal, send them a fiasco

Even Liverpool, Arsenal said that they abused them. Even if Hamburg is proud, they know that they are not a team of the same level as Liverpool, and they have been squashed and rounded by Arsenal casually!

Therefore, at the Emirates Stadium, Hamburg did not send all the main lineup. The head coach of Hamburg hid half of the main players. Their purpose is very clear, that is, to lose as little as possible and not to be beaten too embarrassingly.

But Arsenal didn't need to think so much. The main players who had just rested in the contest with Newcastle all played, and only Quaresma was sitting on the bench. They are bound to win this game.

Quaresma also wanted to play, but Wenger did not give him this opportunity. When facing Newcastle, Quaresma single-handedly killed his opponent, which consumed a lot of energy. Let Quaresma rest!

For this,

Quaresma is very helpless, you know, he has never played the last two rounds of the Champions League group stage.

Barcelona didn't count that season. Back in the Portuguese Super League, in Porto, Quaresma led Porto to a super record in the first four rounds of the group stage, and secured the qualifying places early. Even Chelsea, Porto made them lose their temper , In that situation, Quaresma was hidden by the snow and did not play the last two rounds.

When I came to Arsenal last season, the situation was similar. It was also because I locked in the first place in the group ahead of time. The last two rounds of the group stage became irrelevant. Wenger, who always thought that Quaresma was not physically fit, would naturally not kill Quaresma. Sima, he missed the last two rounds again.

And now, history repeats itself

Quaresma feels that if things go smoothly like this, he may not have the opportunity to play in the last two rounds of the group stage throughout his career!

This severely restricted me from breaking the record!

In the two games, even if he was not in good form, why didn't he score two goals against an opponent who had almost surrendered?

No way, who made the old man stubborn!

However, compared with last season, at least his goals have improved again, and he doesn't seem to care too much about the gains and losses of these two games.

In the 4 rounds of the group stage last season, Quaresma scored a total of 5 goals, which became the focus at the time, and then he shined in the knockout rounds, helping Arsenal with his goals one after another. Na stood on the final podium.

And this season, in the first four rounds of the group stage, Quaresma scored 8 goals unbelievably, scoring twice in all four games, which made the opponent extremely terrified.

Everyone was amazed by Quaresma's wonderful performance. If such scoring efficiency is maintained, then at the end of the season, Quaresma will definitely be able to refresh his personal scoring record in a single season in the Champions League just created last season.

Therefore, it doesn't matter if you can't play in two games in one game.

Sitting on the bench, Quaresma is bored. His teammates are playing vigorously on the field, but he can only eat bananas on the bench. He really wants to throw banana peels into the Hamburg goal, but he doesn't know if it counts as a goal. !

The wolf-like teammates really didn't leave any chance for their opponents. In the first half, they beat their opponents 2:0 like cutting melons and vegetables.

The score is not the key, the key is that Arsenal completely took the initiative of the game in their own hands. The opponent only got a few poor counterattack opportunities, but they were still strangled in the cradle.

At least from the point of view of the situation, the two teams are not at the same level at all, just like the first team and the reserve team, the gap is even bigger than that.

One was able to win the Champions League, but the other was beaten to the ground in the group stage. There is no comparison.

The extremely boring Quaresma couldn't sit still in the second half, stood up and dangled from time to time, walked back and forth in front of Wenger, and went back and forth.

You have to get Wenger's attention and let him give himself a chance to play.

Sitting on the bench, the whole body is about to grow hair!

However, Wenger, who is in the presence of the old god, seems to have made up his mind to turn a blind eye to Quaresma. Anyway, if you want to pass by, just pass by, and I will never pay attention to you.

Quaresma looked dejected. According to Wenger's attitude, even if he stepped out of the blisters in front of him, Wenger would not change his mind.

—The obstinate old man!

Huh?

How about I buy a copy of The Sun and give Wenger a try?

The girls on the third page of the Sun newspaper are always so hot, and I don’t know which one Wenger likes, or I can order a newspaper for a year for Wenger, so that he won’t be sneaking around all the time?

In the wild, Arsenal scored again on the field, and Hamburg still had no resistance.

At this point, Quaresma knew that his game was completely dead!

There are many resentments, and I am not in the retirement stage. If I have nothing to do, I will always take turns, so I am not afraid that my state will be worn out?

In the end, when the referee blew the whistle for the end of the game, Quaresma didn't get a minute of playing time. He sat on the bench throughout the game and became a spectator who didn't need to buy tickets for a while.

And Arsenal also beat Hamburg with a score of 4:0, winning five consecutive victories in the group stage and securing the first position in the group ahead of schedule.

It can be said that, except for Quaresma, who is eager to play and score goals, everyone is simply happy.

Quaresma, who held back the whole game, felt that the fans of Arsenal's next opponent, Bolton, needed to observe a moment of silence for their team in advance. God knows what destructive blow he would cause to Bolton after holding back for so long.

However, just after the match against Hamburg, Quaresma received a piece of good news that excited him.

——"French Football" magazine is coming to take a cover photo for myself.

In fact, compared with the selection of the World Footballer of the Year, the selection of the European Ballon d'Or has never been a secret, because according to the usual practice, the "French Football" magazine will take a special team to take the cover photo for the award-winning players, and only the winners are like this Treatment, so who will win the award is actually clear at this moment.

"French Football" did not deliberately cover up, the team arrived in London by plane in broad daylight, and the secret spread like wildfire.

In a professional studio, accompanied by Mendes and Arsenal club staff, Quaresma was constantly fiddled with by photographers, trying to take the most ideal cover photo.

Not all photographers in the fashion industry are sissies and gays, at least the photographers hired by "French Football" are normal, at least superficially normal.

"Show your charming and sexy pectoralis major, oh, this is really a perfect body that makes people mesmerize!"

"Would you mind showing a little more?"

"I think those female fans will definitely scream for you!"

"Beep!"

The absence of the cold image that Quaresma had imagined undoubtedly made him heave a sigh of relief. If he were to be pinched on his chest by a sissy photographer, Quaresma would probably be sick for several days.

It was just a cover photo and a few column photos, but Quaresma changed into three suits and two sets of casual clothes under the photographer's fiddling, and took hundreds of photos, which was more tiring than training .

But I have to admit that the professionalism of professionals is undoubtedly much better than Quaresma's selfies.

Quaresma didn't know which photo "French Football" would put on the cover of the magazine in the end, so long as he passed his cynical smile to everyone, it was enough.

At this moment, the media are also frantically reporting the news of Quaresma's award. As a public opinion media, they naturally attach great importance to the timeliness of the news. They already know the result, but they are still waiting for the final award ceremony to report. The media can only wait to go bankrupt.

"European Ballon d'Or early exposure: Quaresma reaches the pinnacle"

"French football has taken a cover photo for Quaresma, the Portuguese King's award is certain"

"The answer is revealed, Quaresmana takes the golden ball, Henry Zidane runs with him"

"Aspire to score goals, Quaresma is only one step away from the king"

The development of the British media industry has also made them the center of the world's media, and the news that Quaresma shot the magazine cover for "French Football" also spread all over the world in the first place, causing another explosion of public opinion .

The new king is finally on the throne!

After winning the World Cup, Quaresma has become the number one player in world football in the eyes of fans. However, after all, he has not waited for the European Golden Globe Award and the honorary title of World Footballer, even if it is only a matter of time, But after all, the name is not right.

But now, Quaresma has finally won the European Golden Globe, which symbolizes the highest honor, and no one will question Quaresma anymore.

This is the beginning of a new era!

Prior to this, the previous Golden Globe winners were all familiar superstars, and they were also old faces in world football.

Now, the birth of Quaresma has brought world football into a new era-after Zidane and Ronaldo have gradually faded out of the game, the era of Quaresma has come!

However, when countless Arsenal fans, Portuguese national team fans and countless Quaresma fans were rejoicing, there were still a lot of doubts.

This is an era that needs the attention of bloggers to stand out. If you can't catch a wave of enthusiasm, then what kind of public opinion is there.

"French Football" magazine will not admit that they have photographed the magazine cover for Quaresma, and this has become "no evidence" in the mouths of many media.

Some media claimed that the so-called "shooting the magazine cover in advance" was simply a fiction created by the English media. In fact, there was no such thing at all.

There are also media reports that there is indeed a "French Football" team that has come to London, but they are shooting for another Arsenal star. This star is Quaresma's teammate Henry. Obviously, Henry is also eligible to win the European Golden Ball award.

Some media also said that this time "French Football" broke the rules and took photos of the candidates with the highest calls for awards, so it is not yet certain that Quaresma has won the European Ballon d'Or.

Anyway, I have everything I want to say, I just want to take advantage of this wave of enthusiasm to increase attention and sales.

Not to mention, some people actually believed these nonsensical arguments, as if everything was really confusing.

Which news is true?

In this regard, Quaresma can't laugh or cry, he has really seen the power of the media!

It has been said that controlling public opinion controls the entire world, and this sentence is not without reason.

If, say, something happened, but if all the media opened their eyes to tell lies and reported the incident in the opposite direction, then everyone would think that it might be like this.

Take the Champions League final last season as an example. Arsenal defeated Barcelona and won the Big Ears Cup. Tens of thousands of fans witnessed the legend on the spot. At the same time, hundreds of millions of fans also watched the game in front of the TV.

But if fans are not allowed to enter the game, and there is no live TV broadcast, and the media can only wait for the end of the game and the results of the game will be passed on to the world, then the media will really do what they say!

Even if the media said that Barcelona won the Big Ears Cup, the fans would not know the truth!

Although it is exaggerated to say so, the power of public opinion must not be underestimated.

Naturally, Quaresma would not say anything. Although the perimeter of the Kearney training base was full of reporters, it was impossible for Quaresma to disclose the news that he had won the European Ballon d'Or. Chased and intercepted, he could only rely on the staff of the training base to help out.

"It's really hard work to help you out. If you can always attract a large number of reporters squatting here every day, then I may have to consider changing jobs!"

After helping Quaresma out of the siege, the staff at the Kearney training base complained jokingly.

Quaresma smiled, and said without any airs: "If you really decide to leave, then I can introduce you to a filming job. My former teammate Fabiano is currently planning to establish a small film company. I am also recruiting actors, I think if I recommend you to him, he will still give me face."

The staff was stunned for a while, and didn't understand what it meant to make a film for a while.

But Quaresma didn't explain, and had already walked into the training base with a big laugh.

Only the staff members were left stunned in place, words like "movie", "star", "actor" and so on kept flashing in their minds, and they couldn't help being crazy.

Walking into the locker room, Quaresma greeted Henry with resentful little eyes, making it look like a resentful woman who was abandoned by Quaresma.

Quaresma felt overwhelmed, and for some reason, Henry was becoming more and more dishonest now.

"How's your party going?" Eboue leaned over with a look of uncontrollable hunger.

Quaresma gave Eboue a blank look, "Just say how many you want, don't make a serious look, who doesn't know who!"

Eboue was not at all concerned about whether Quaresma had pierced his mind, so he laughed cheekily, and then he stretched out a slap to Quaresma, five fingers.

"roll!"

Quaresma cursed angrily.

Want five more?

I'm not afraid of exhausting you!

Even if you're black and want to get five in one night, you're probably close to getting it done.

"I want six!"

"I want seven!"

"I want ten!"

The teammates booed at the side, one is more face-saving than the other - with my strength, there must be more than you, right?

Quaresma couldn't help shivering. If this is the case, then I am afraid that for a week after the party, a group of people will train on the Arsenal training ground.

Quaresma handed it to Walcott who just yelled "I want ten". This kid's hair hasn't grown yet. Are you afraid that ten young models will line up to pluck your sparse hair?

"I don't ask for more, two are enough, but I must have a young model with rhinitis, otherwise I am really afraid that I will be accused of murder again!" Gallas said with lingering fear.

Barak, who was next to Gallas, who had the same fate as Gallas, also nodded in agreement. Their life is really hard.

Quaresma felt like his eyes were rolling to the ceiling this morning.

What is this all about?

"Then how about I give you young models who have feet earlier than you and have better taste? This way they won't affect each other!" Quaresma said angrily.

Gallas and Ballack waved their hands again and again when they heard the words.

"Then I have to worry about whether I will be smoked down!"

This is the same as "Even if I am a toad, I will never find my mother toad".

But at this moment, Flamini approached mysteriously and sat next to Quaresma.

"You put away your little pill, I don't need it!"

Before Flamini could open his mouth, Quaresma had already guessed his purpose—it must be that his laboratory had developed some weird little pills, and this product was here to sell himself.

But Quaresma was only half right!

Flamini was indeed there to sell, but not to sell his little pill.

"Ricardo, I don't sell small pills anymore!" Flamini looked aggrieved, perhaps the customer's attitude hurt his heart, and his tone was even more bitter than Henry's, "It's like this, don't you want Do you want to have a party, I can provide young model services, I just set up a brokerage company with my friends, specializing in this kind of business!"

Bustard!

This word flashed in Quaresma's mind instantly!

Then, the image of Flamini in front of him gradually wanted to overlap with the image of the tortoise in the impression, wearing a round hat and holding a teapot, nodding and bowing, and there was no sense of disobedience.

Nima!

Quaresma felt that his whole world view was about to collapse!

How can you say that Flamini is a professional player, but you still do this kind of thing, are you crazy?

Perhaps because he misunderstood Quaresma's shocked expression, Flamini hurriedly explained: "Don't worry, the price is fair. After all, we are our own people. I can give you an internal price, and I guarantee that the young model is of high quality. It is by no means mediocre." Fat vulgar powder!"

Quaresma couldn't help giving Flamini a thumbs up, you are a born businessman!

He is very suspicious now, will Flamini sell nuclear weapons to him one day in the future?

Seeing that Barcelona is unhappy, a nuclear warhead will pass, and the Nou Camp will become barren

Couldn't help shivering, shook his head and quickly got rid of this terrible thought, Quaresma looked at Flamini with a look of "totally defeated by you", he really wanted to know, this salesman Are you kidding me.

All right!

No matter what, Flamini's business needs to be taken care of, and it doesn't matter what the internal price is, he is not short of the money, as long as the quality of the tender model is really high enough!

If there are really a group of older young models, then except for Xiaofa, who may be a little happier, others can kill Quaresma!

"Then you go according to the head, for the sake of their health, one person, two, more, and more active atmosphere!" Quaresma sighed, and then said: "Also consider personal preferences, give little Falai, the two older ones, and Gallas's rhinitis requirements must be met, and this is probably the case!"

Flamini was overjoyed and made a deal. Even if he gave Quaresma an internal price, he and his partners could make a lot of money.

As the scale of his business grows bigger and bigger, he feels that he is about to become the god of sales!

Maybe one day, as my industrial layout enters thousands of households, I may be on the Forbes rich list.

Flamini had longed for that day!

Well, the customer Quaresma is the best customer, as long as he can maintain it well, he can let himself eat for a lifetime.

"goallllllllllllllllllllllll!"

"Just 18 seconds into the game, Quaresma scored his 16th Premier League goal of the season!"

"Arsenal are ahead!"

"Quaresma is like a tiger. The entire Reebok Stadium is his territory. He can swear his sovereignty at will!"

"And scoring goals is the best way to swear sovereignty!"

"His state is too shocking!"

After three days of preparations, Arsenal came to Bolton to challenge their opponents. The game had just begun, and even the fans hadn't entered the fierce atmosphere of the game. Quaresma, who was fully fired, had already broken Bolton's goal.

On the one hand, he was suffocated by not being able to play in the last game. On the other hand, after the game, Quaresma will go to the headquarters of "French Football" to receive the European Ballon d'Or. He wants to celebrate with the most amazing performance His first Golden Globe.

Therefore, Quaresma was very excited at the beginning of the game. With the cooperation of his teammates, he rushed into the Bolton penalty area three times and two times, and then sent the ball into the opponent's goal. It was as simple as just going through the motions.

After scoring the goal, Quaresma was also very excited. Regardless of the fact that this is the opponent's home court, he celebrated very happily. He had a premonition that he would definitely score again today!

Facts have proved that men's hunches are usually very accurate.

Soon, Quaresma scored again, and more than one.

Before the first half of the game was over, Quaresma had already completed a hat-trick. He pressed Bolton to the ground and rubbed repeatedly, and the arrangement was clear.

Bolton fans originally had a little expectation that the team could cause some trouble for Arsenal at home.

But who would have thought that Quaresma, an unreasonable thing, would not give Bolton this chance at all, and he played so excitedly.

It's not fair!

Why didn't Quaresma play so hard when he was playing other teams, and now it's his turn to play Bolton, so he just kills so much?

Complain about him!

No matter how angry the Bolton fans were in the stands, Quaresma was already playing well, and the momentum that had been suppressed for so long after not being able to play in the last game was completely released, and he felt comfortable all over his body!

In the second half, Quaresma wanted to have another big four, but this wish was not realized in the end, which is very regrettable.

It wasn't that Quaresma was replaced, nor was Quaresma taking the initiative to clock out of get off work. It was because the opponent was too targeted at Quaresma. As long as Quaresma dared to make a breakthrough with the ball, they would dare to go to Quaresma. With a shovel on his ankle, the threat of a disabled person is extremely obvious.

"You're already wearing a hat, it's almost enough, if you go too far, I'll let you be carried off the field sideways!"

This is how Quaresma felt threatened from the faces of Bolton players.

Well, barefoot people are not afraid of wearing shoes. If Bolton did this, Quaresma really didn't dare to fight too hard.

For a goal, if I was really injured by them for a month, it would really not be worth it.

Therefore, you must know that at the end of the game, Quaresma failed to score again, but remained in the state of completing a hat-trick.

Even so, Quaresma still makes all fans feel incredible, even if they may have to show the same expression every week, they still can't help it.

Quaresma scored again, and it was a hat-trick!

Arsenal opponents, can't you limit Quaresma?

At the end of every match day, they watch the highlights of the goals. After Quaresma always scores goals, they find that watching the highlights is a waste of time!