I am Quaresma

Regardless of Porto, CSKA Moscow, or Bundesliga Hamburg, they are all second-tier teams in the European battlefield. They may cause some troubles for the giants, but it is difficult to create miracles.

But these three teams faced Arsenal, but they couldn't even find a chance to breathe. Couldn't such an Arsenal be called strong?

The fundamental reason for Arsenal's strength is not that the new aid Ballack has supported Arsenal's midfield backbone, but that they have the unstoppable presence of Quaresma.

In the four group matches, Quares scored twice and scored a total of eight goals. Even without the support of other teammates, his eight goals can still ensure Arsenal's four consecutive victories.

You know, in the previous season, these eight goals were enough to ensure that Quaresma ranked among the top scorers in the Champions League, and it is even possible to finally win the Champions League Golden Boot.

But now, the season has just started, and the group stage has only finished four rounds. With Quaresma's current scoring efficiency, no one knows what kind of miracle Quaresma can create at the end of the Champions League.

At least, the Champions League single-season scoring record just set by Quaresma last season should be dead!

As long as Arsenal go far enough, the Champions League Golden Boot is almost in Quaresma's pocket.

And Quaresma's goals in the Premier League are equally breathtaking, leading the scorer list by a distance, leaving Henry and Drogba and other shooters can only sigh.

For a phenomenal winger like Quaresma, some people have come to a conclusion, I am afraid he will lead the birth of a new genre, and the era of wingers has come!

...

In the next round of the league, Arsenal challenged West Ham away, and Quaresma, who was in excellent form, still got the chance to start. Even though Wenger adopted a large rotation, in order to ensure victory, he still chose to trust Quaresma horse.

Van Persie also got the chance to start the game. After confirming that he was included in the starting list, this guy has been pestering Quaresma, shamelessly asking Quaresma to feed him cakes.

Naturally, Quaresma will not fail to keep his promise, so after confirming that there will be no waves in the game, he will definitely create opportunities for Van Persie as much as possible.

No one is trustworthy, this time he fooled Van Persie, then don't expect him to do anything for you next time.

But what Quaresma believes in more is-people do not stand up without waves!

In such a wonderful football world,

Surrounded by countless wonderful things, even if Quaresma wants to grow up in a serious way, it is unrealistic, so let's enjoy it!

West Ham United is not a strong team, although they are nicknamed the Hammers, and their style of play is similarly brutal, but because Reading made things big, West Ham United are also afraid of being implicated, so they have been very nervous recently. It is restraint. Facing Arsenal, it is inevitable to fall into a passive position.

Halfway through the first half, Quaresma threatened from a corner and instigated an attack that ended with Ballack poking the ball into West Ham's goal in a chaotic fray.

Not long after, Eboue contributed a shocking world wave on the right, rewriting the score to 2:0.

The game has lost its suspense so far!

So in the second half, Quaresma began to focus more on pancakes for Van Persie, and he didn't even care much about whether he could score goals.

However, Van Persie's poor scoring efficiency has always been Quaresma's biggest worry. He doesn't want to work for a long time but get nothing.

His worry is not unreasonable, as it turns out, Van Persie is a bit unreliable.

Not long after the start of the second half, Quaresma sent a through pass to Van Persie from the ribs. Robinson had already turned around and got a single-handed chance, but sent the ball into the arms of the West Ham United goalkeeper.

While Van Persie held his head in regret, Quaresma also made the same action, and the regrets of the two were completely synchronized.

I am afraid that if it were Henry or Adebayor, Arsenal would have already scored goals, but Van Persie would waste opportunities endlessly. It is really hard for Quaresma to imagine how the future General Van Persie will be made?

How could Quaresma be reconciled to such a waste of an assist.

So next, Quaresma continued to feed Van Persie, just like an animal breeder cared for the animals in every possible way.

Within a few minutes, Quaresma sent a sharp cross from the left, and Van Persie grabbed the point from the center, but his header was far above the crossbar and missed the goal again.

Quaresma regretted it a bit!

Why did you agree on three assists in the first place?

If it was just three threatening passes, then Quaresma would be able to complete it very quickly, but now it is three assists. With Van Persie's mentally retarded scoring efficiency, it won't make him unable to complete the agreement throughout his career, right?

How to do?

Could it be that he broke his promise, broke his promise, and gave up continuing to make van Persie pancakes?

Quaresma really can't do it.

Therefore, I can only continue to stuff Van Persie's mouth. As for whether he can score a goal, he can only resign himself to fate.

In the 75th minute of the second half, Van Persie got the most threatening shot of the game. Quaresma's ribs sent a through ball in front of him. Van Persie turned around and entered the small penalty area. No one can stop him.

I can't help but cheer and celebrate, not just celebrating the goal, but also celebrating my difficult assist.

However, things are far from that simple.

The West Ham United goalkeeper did not make an effective save in the face of a shot that was close at hand, but Van Persie's shot did not fly directly into the goal.

Duang! ! !

With a loud bang, the ball hit the post hard, causing the goal to buzz. The strength of Van Persie's shot is simply amazing.

But before the fans exclaimed because of the goalpost, the ball bounced back after hitting the goalpost, and directly hit the unprepared Van Persie's face, hitting it with one blow.

If the broadcast camera can capture that moment, I am afraid the fans will be able to see Van Persie's deformed face.

There are many kinds of shots, including dexterous shots, violent shots, and arc shots. Even if they have some nicknames, they are probably tiger shots or eagle shots.

However, Van Persie's shot was definitely a suicide shot.

Quaresma clearly heard Van Persie's scream from the bottom of his heart.

"I'm in pain for you!"

It's okay, it's just stuffy on the face, it's just a small whole face, if the position is moved further down, it's stuffy under the lower abdomen, it's really a major operation!

However, stupid people have stupid blessings, and things that happen to be a blessing in disguise are often very common.

After the ball hit Van Persie's face, it rebounded again and bounced towards the goal of West Ham United. The goalkeeper of West Ham United couldn't react in time.

All the fans of West Ham United were stunned in the stands. The development of the plot far exceeded their expectations, and the turning and reversal were beyond their grasp.

This way of scoring is a bit weird!

If Van Persie's normal shot broke their goal, they would be disappointed, but they would not show such a surprised expression.

Everyone would have thought that Van Persie would give them a fatal blow with such a weird way of scoring. Even fans with too much imagination would just be dumbfounded at this time.

This is the legendary "killing one thousand enemies, harming oneself eight hundred"?

West Ham United fans really want to tell Van Persie, in fact, you don’t need to use self-harm to score goals, and we won’t stop you if you score normally

Van Persie was hit on the face and lay down on his back, feeling as if the whole earth was stuffed on his face. The sourness, accompanied by tears and snot, almost filled the whole world.

However, when he found out that he had scored a goal just now, he was stunned again!

What the hell is going on here?

Can anyone tell me, did I just score with my face?

So, does this count?

Van Persie no longer knows how to describe his current mood.

Excited?

Excited?

Or is it slightly bitter?

Scoring goals made him excited, but this painful way of scoring goals that might become a laughing stock made him a little embarrassed.

It's like a swordsman who practiced swordsmanship hard and forgot to bring his own sword when he was dueling with others, so he could only pick up bricks and overthrow his opponent.

Such a victory is really embarrassing!

What I am best at is useless, but I win in a funny way. Is this God joking?

Just when Van Persie didn't know whether he should celebrate or not, his teammates rushed up, laughing so hard that they wanted to roll on the turf a few times. Van Persie's unlucky virtue was really overwhelming.

Even the West Ham United fans in the stands forgot the pain of losing the ball and laughed heartlessly. You must laugh first before talking about such a rare and funny scene.

"Your goal must be recorded in history. Maybe 100 years later, your name will not be remembered, but this goal will definitely be remembered!"

"Robin, teach me how to score goals with your face! This brand-new shooting method is too technical!"

"Well, does your face hurt?"

"I think you may have a tendency to be disfigured. Let me introduce you to a plastic surgery hospital. They have superb technology and low fees. They will definitely meet your various needs!"

The team members rubbed Van Persie's hair, surrounded him and walked back to their own half with Van Persie's still bewildered expression, celebrating lively while walking.

It's just that Quaresma couldn't help scratching his head at this time, because he wasn't sure if the goal counted as his assist.

Although his own pass created this kind of threat, Van Persie's shot failed to score the goal at the first time. After the ball hit the post, Van Persie scored with his face. If he strictly followed the rules, this might not be considered his own assist at all.

After working for a long time and getting nothing, Quaresma couldn't help feeling a little aggrieved.

Regardless of whether it is officially counted or not, I will forget it anyway. This ball must be counted as an assist.

You don't have to reason with me, it's not that I have to sympathize with you because your face is swollen.

At this time, Quaresma has no reason to speak.

At the end of the game, the score was already 4:0. Arsenal beat their opponents again and took all three points.

Although Quaresma didn't score a goal, the team won, and he also fed Van Persie a piece of cake, and he was in a good mood.

After the game, Quaresma was definitely not the focus, but Van Persie, whose face was already swollen like a sweet potato, was.

He's really famous, with his face

"I really don't want to be famous like this, what should I do?" On the bus, Van Persie wailed with a mournful face.

"You should be content. You know, there are so many people who want to be famous and popular, but they don't even have a chance. Do you know how rare this opportunity is?" Quaresma teased Van Persie. I think Van Persie is a bit hypocritical.

For a striker, scoring goals is the paramount pursuit.

No matter how you score, if the ball gets into the opponent's goal, that is your success!

Van Persie's scoring efficiency at Arsenal was appallingly inefficient, and he repeatedly wasted good opportunities. Now that he finally scored, he felt a little embarrassed by the way he scored. Isn't this hypocritical?

If this choice is thrown to other forwards, and the choice is between not scoring and scoring with their faces, then I am afraid that most forwards will choose to score with their faces, and that is not a shame!

You can't even eat instant noodles, why are you hungry for a full banquet?

"I'd rather score with my face!" Walcott looked at Van Persie enviously and said, "But I don't even have the chance to score with my face!"

That expression and eyes, as if Van Persie picked up a pie that fell from the sky!

Hearing this, Quaresma couldn't help but smile at Walcott. This wish can actually be fulfilled!

If you also want to score goals with your face, then I can create this opportunity for you!

As long as you stand at the right angle, with my superb shooting skills, I can hit your face with a shot and the ball bounces to score a goal, it will definitely be possible!

Provided you can bear it

There were laughter and laughter on the bus, and the players were discussing the relationship between goals and faces enthusiastically. Even Wenger couldn't help but joined the discussion, and the atmosphere was extremely relaxed.

The first team got a chance to rest and adjust again. They don't need to participate in the League Cup in the middle of the week. Even if they have to face the strong enemy Liverpool on the weekend, the animals can't bear the desire to hold a party. .

"We're just celebrating Robin's goal with his face, really!" Xiaofa revealed sincerity in his eyes.

Always find a high-sounding reason for the party, even if everyone knows it is self-deception, but at least this way they can feel more at ease.

At this time, even Van Persie felt that his face did not hurt so much.

At least a swollen face is not useless, and it seems to be worthwhile as a reason for their legitimacy.

Quaresma rolled his eyes at the side. The reason for this party is indeed very strong, as if you have to use the reason of "the neighbor's sow gave birth to eight piglets in one litter" to celebrate

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