I am Quaresma

In the afternoon, Quaresma came to the school as usual to accompany Emma in class, and at the same time recharge himself. He didn't want to become a guy with a simple mind and well-developed limbs.

Well, even in sleep, I have to be influenced by the academic atmosphere in my sleep to improve the taste of every cell in my body

Emma looked at Quaresma, who was drooling all over the floor beside her, with a helpless expression. She was really afraid that the classroom would be submerged by the flood.

She thought about her possible death like a philosopher, but she never wanted to be drowned!

But at this time, the professor on the podium noticed the sleeping Quaresma.

If he was just sleeping, she wouldn't bother even at such a sensitive age as menopause.

The problem is that Quaresma's snoring is almost louder than her lecture, and she can't stand it anymore!

"Wake him up!" the professor said to Emma majestically.

Quaresma was in a daze, dreaming that he seemed to be holding the Hercules Cup again, and that feeling was more enjoyable than doing some shameless things with Emma.

But at this moment, Meimeng woke up, the scene changed, and he returned to reality. In the cold classroom, even Quaresma couldn't help shivering. Everyone's eyes were on him, even in the cold classroom. There is always a lot of attention on the court, and Quaresma is still not quite used to it at this time.

"Don't you think sleeping in class is the most impolite behavior for teachers' hard work?" The female professor said to Quaresma in a lecture tone. Although she didn't watch the football, at least she knew about Quaresma. Big star, her daughter talks about Quaresma all day long.

Quaresma may not have woken up yet, so he blurted out subconsciously: "I think it's the most rude behavior to wake others up from their dreams!"

There was silence everywhere, and everyone looked at Quaresma with incredulous eyes, making Quaresma shudder instantly, as if he was in the atmosphere of a horror movie.

Damn, what did I say?

Quaresma covered his mouth with a look of fear.

Even Emma is about to collapse a bit, are you here for class, or are you here to make trouble?

Needless to say, Quaresma was thrown out of the classroom,

And it is estimated that in the future, he will not have to think about being able to attend this female professor's class.

But it’s okay, at least there is no danger to his life now, Quaresma swore that just now he really felt that the female professor’s expression was so angry that he wanted to kill himself.

After waiting in the cafe until the end of get out of class, Emma ran over with a resentful face, and she was accompanied by her fat girl friend.

"You are really powerful. After you left, the professor vented all his firepower on me! How do you think you want to compensate me?"

Quaresma chuckled, "Then I'll vent my firepower on you too!"

Emma gave Quaresma a flirtatious look, and sat opposite Quaresma.

At this time, Quaresma also said hello to Emma's fat girl friend, because they always come to look for Emma, ​​so now Quaresma and Emma's friends are also very familiar.

"Ricardo, can you do Lisa a favor and give her a chance to get in touch with your teammates?" After hesitating for a moment, Emma suddenly asked Quaresma under the blushing face of the fat girl next to her.

Quaresma was taken aback for a moment, unable to react for a while.

"Are you insured?" came out again without thinking, but Quaresma certainly thought so.

If she wasn't buying insurance, she might be selling something. Otherwise, why did she give her the opportunity to get in touch with her teammates?

"No, it's not!" Fat girl Lisa hastily defended, but she just sat down when she got up, as if remembering something sad!

Seeing this scene, Quaresma felt as if he had grasped the truth of the matter.

Such resentment, I am afraid that some bastard in the Arsenal team played with his feelings?

However, Quaresma immediately overturned his own idea, for no other reason, Lisa is too fat!

Not to mention fat and greasy, but it is wider than a Quaresma when standing up, and its footprints on the ground are honest. It weighs more than 170 pounds, and even a Quaresma is far from reaching this weight Standard too!

After all, they are all professional players. If they don't have any kind of woman they want, they shouldn't be so hungry!

However, Quaresma was still a little bit drummed in his heart, and couldn't help muttering: Football in this world is weird, and professional players have all kinds of hobbies, even old ladies are liked, so why can't there be someone who likes fat people?

So, it's really possible.

Perhaps it was embarrassing to stay here, the fat girl Lisa blushed and left, taking a step but turning her head three times, the look of reluctance made Quaresma really feel strange.

At this time, Emma sighed, with great sympathy in her tone, and whispered to Quaresma: "Actually, this is the case!"

"Don't look at Lisa who is fat now, but when she first entered school, she was the real beauty of our school!"

Having said that, Quaresma almost fell to the ground.

Just her?

School Belle?

Is the aesthetics of boys in your school still stuck in the caveman period?

But even in the caveman period, I am afraid that being so fat is not considered beautiful!

Quaresma's extremely astonished reaction made Emma give him a reproachful look before continuing: "At that time, she was not fat, she was tall, extremely sexy and hot, and was regarded by countless boys as her dream lover! "

The expression on Quaresma's face was still extremely shocked. He couldn't associate the image of the fat girl with the school belle.

But I have to admit that after removing the fat all over her body, she can still see the appearance of a beautiful woman from her eyebrows and eyes. Maybe Emma is telling the truth.

But what's the use of talking about it now, they're all fat like that, there's no hope!

"Actually, that's how it happened!"

Emma started talking.

"Lisa likes football, so she also has a natural affection for professional players. She most wants to find a professional player to be her partner and spend her life with her!"

"That's why she rejected the pursuit of so many people!"

"And at a party, she met a young player who stalked Lisa. Although he hadn't played in the professional league yet and only played in the reserve team, Lisa still didn't reject him!"

"That young man comes to the school to look for Lisa every day, with sweet words, various small gifts, and buys Lisa a lot of snacks every day!"

Quaresma felt disdainful from the bottom of his heart when he heard this.

It's really low enough for a dignified professional player to use snacks to pursue girls!

So, Lisa fell like this?

Quaresma was also curious.

Emma took a sip of coffee, sighed, and continued, "You know, most girls can't control their mouths. Lisa ate a lot of snacks every day, and then she became like this!"

Quaresma couldn't help being dumbfounded, it turned out that the fat man was transformed in this way!

How many snacks do you actually eat?

Won't it eat up Wal-Mart?

"And then?" Quaresma was curious, "The two of them are still together now?"

Hearing Quaresma's question, Emma showed a look of resentment on her face, and said angrily: "That bastard saw Lisa out of shape, and never showed up again. He dumped Lisa!"

Now, Quaresma has nothing to say!

Should he call that person a scumbag, or should he sympathize with him in his heart?

It's like finally finding the one you like, but by mistake, Shizuka is fed with snacks and turned into a fat tiger. I'm afraid that guy is the tragedy, okay?

"This is really a sad story!" At this time, no matter what Quaresma thinks in his heart, he must stand on the same stand as Emma.

"Oh, by the way, which team is that bastard from? Next time we meet, I will definitely teach Lisa a lesson!" Quaresma said, shaking his fist.

"I'm not in the reserve team now, I can't play in the first team, and now I seem to be sold to a low-level league team to play, what is it called Doncaster!"

Quaresma was taken aback when he heard the words, the name was both familiar and strange to him.

Where have I seen this club name before?

I can't think of it even if I break my head!

Then, simply don't think about it, let's talk about it when we meet! "

"So, why create opportunities for him to get in touch with my teammates?" Quaresma wondered.

Emma sighed again, "She likes professional players, so she wants to see if it is possible for her to call a certain player in the Arsenal team!"

Quaresma gasped.

Sure enough!

What else can he say?

Since his girlfriend made a request, he could only pat his chest to assure him.

Anyway, the group of animals are very tasteful and weird, maybe there is someone who likes fat girls!

For example, Xiaofa, since he can like mature women, why can't he like fat girls?

For example, Eboue, if I remember correctly, his future wife seems to be quite fat too!

For example, Lehman, who fights with his wife every day, doesn't he want to change?

Really not, and Walcott too!

That little guy is probably not a human being, any woman is the same for him

Then let's hold a party, it can be regarded as my own dedication, even if no one wants the fat girl, Emma can't say that she doesn't help.

When the Arsenal team regrouped, Quaresma told his team-mates about the party, and they went wild with joy.

However, due to the intensive schedule for the next period of time, the party will have to be postponed for a while. If the players dare to commit crimes against the wind, it is estimated that Wenger, who is getting more and more violent, will kill them.

Even if he kills someone, Wenger will not plead guilty, because he may have forgotten that he killed someone

In the seventh round of the league on the weekend, Arsenal played against Watford at home.

A newly promoted team with weak strength will definitely not be arrogant in front of Arsenal. However, most of the international players in the Arsenal team have just gone through a long journey, and the game status is difficult to guarantee. The FIFA virus will trouble the giants at any time.

Therefore, Wenger had to adopt a substantial rotation, and the starting lineup was all members who did not participate in the national team competition.

Quaresma started the game. After all, he didn't have anything to do with the national team. However, Wenger had already confirmed before the game that he would only give Quaresma half-time in this game, because he had to play for the next round. Stay prepared for the Champions League in the middle of the week.

Although Quaresma has not played a game for two weeks, his whole body is itchy and uncomfortable, and he must not be able to play half of the game, but there is no way, playing half of the game is better than sitting on the bench, so don't expect too much.

After playing, Quaresma was like opening the gate to release water, and he was out of control, killing the Hornet to the point of crying.

In just 5 minutes of the opening, Quaresma made continuous breakthroughs on the left, cut inside and scored successfully. At this time, the Watford players have not yet entered the game state!

Very bullying!

At this moment, all the fans watching the match had such an idea.

Watford is a guest at the Emirates Stadium. Before the bench under your butt is hot, it’s fine if you don’t serve tea. You even picked up a big stick and beat him out. Isn’t this the way of hospitality that always starts with hypocrisy? For a bar

But Quaresma is often so simple and rude, just like Arsenal's overall style now, do it first and then talk.

Not long after taking the lead, Quaresma gave Henry another assist, and an attack he instigated on the left finally allowed Henry to score twice, completely feeding Henry.

The first half of the game is not over yet, Arsenal have already led Watford 3-0.

The Arsenal fans are so happy that they are about to faint. This is the Arsenal they are looking forward to the most. Don't ink with them when facing the underdogs.

Watford really wanted to counterattack, but just as he rushed out of the trench with the explosives, he was wiped out by a wave of artillery fire from Arsenal and wiped out on the spot. Not to mention the counterattack, even the current position is almost unable to hold up.

Quaresma couldn't help being complacent. If even an opponent like Watford can cause trouble for Arsenal, why would Arsenal fight for the championship?

Why did Chelsea win the Premier League title last season?

You know, Mourinho's team didn't get cheap against Arsenal. With one draw and one loss in two rounds, they never got 3 points from Arsenal.

But in the end Chelsea still won the championship, isn't it because they made fewer mistakes on weak teams!

If you want to win the championship, it doesn't depend on how many wealthy families you overthrow, or how much you steal from the rich and help the poor, but how many ordinary people you bully

Therefore, Quaresma will not be disdainful towards any opponent now. These opponents are all the targets he wants to take all three points.

What's more, Quaresma has to score goals against these opponents!

If the KPI is set in advance for the results of the next season, Quaresma hopes that he will score more than 40 goals in the Premier League.

Then refine the assessment goals and break down the goals. Then in Watford, a bad team, Quaresma hopes that he can score more than 3 goals.

It should be done!

If the goal of two rounds can be achieved in one game, then Quaresma will naturally be happier.

However, Quaresma still failed to complete the task in the end. He only scored twice in this game, but he failed to directly remove Watford from his KPI list.

Not to mention being unhappy, after all, scoring twice is perfect enough, you can't really treat Watford like a salted fish and take a quick shot!

After winning Watford, Arsenal ignored the celebration and flew directly to Moscow.

The 4-hour flight time tortured the players. It was already midnight when they got on the plane in London, and they couldn’t sleep well on the plane, but when they got off the plane, because Moscow was three hours earlier than London, the players They found that Moscow was already working in the morning!

It's a little uncomfortable to be jet-lagged in the same European country!

It has to be said that the Russian team is a cancer in the European war, at least Quaresma thinks so.

Not to mention the distance from the center of Europe, the weather is terribly cold, and the Russian team's style is simple and rough. Putting it all together, even Arsenal would not want to touch such an opponent!

Quaresmarco still remembered that he caught a cold and caught a cold the last time he came to Moscow. He flew around but didn't play a game, and he missed several games when he returned to Lisbon. That was bad luck.

So this time he gained experience and covered himself tightly when he got off the plane, like a polar bear. Although it is not very convenient to move like this, it is really warm.

Don't think that people of the fighting nation are not afraid of the cold. After all, there are only a few people who want demeanor but not temperature. On the streets of Russia, there are not a few people who dress up like Quaresma.

It's only late October, I really don't know what kind of state it will be in the coldest January?

Don't you need to go out?

Quaresma just wants to be an otaku now. After two trips to Moscow, he found that he is a temperate animal at all, and he has no way to resist the severe cold, so now he doesn't want to step out of the hotel door at all.

"Riccardo, are you going to build a snowman?"

"Childish, don't go!"

"Ricardo, are you going to have a snowball fight?"

"No, I'm afraid I'll kill you!"

"Ricardo, it is said that there is a very special igloo in Moscow, everything inside is made of ice, let's go and experience it?"

"No, if I go, I will freeze inside and become a decoration!"

Rejecting all invitations from his teammates, Quaresma planned to stay in the hotel until he got used to training on the field. Quaresma, who had to go out, only wore three layers inside and three layers outside, and then wore the hotel uniform. The quilt is out the door.

Although Quaresma himself felt that it was a bit exaggerated, but in order to prevent colds, there was no other way.

Even on the court, he was already prepared.

FIFA and UEFA do not stipulate that clothes are not allowed inside the jersey. Quaresma has carefully prepared a lot of things this time.

Long johns, warm long johns, and far-infrared warm long johns. Quaresma wears three pairs of long johns, and the same goes for his upper body. If it weren’t for the fact that he couldn’t wear shoes, Quaresma would have to wear three pairs of socks

Looking at it from a distance, it feels like Quaresma's whole body is swollen!

Don't say it, it's warm but really warm!

It would be even better if you give yourself a warm baby!

And it doesn't hurt to fall on the ground!

When the teammates saw such a Quaresma, they all wanted to stay away from him, and the corners of their mouths all twitched slightly.

Aren't you afraid that you won't be able to run on the field?

And what's even more exaggerated is that on the day of the game, when Quaresma was about to play, he actually wrapped a scarf around his head.

The referee can't stand it, it doesn't matter how many long johns you wear, I don't care about you, but isn't it a bit too much for you to wear a plush scarf to play?

"Sorry, please don't wear a scarf on the field, FIFA rules don't allow it!"

The referee walked up to Quaresma righteously and warned him.

Then, Quaresma also told the referee solemnly: "I am not a scarf, I am a headband, but it is a little thicker. There is no rule in FIFA that does not allow you to wear a headband on the field, right?"

FIFA does allow players to wear headbands on the field. If they have long hair, they are often willing to wear a headband to ensure that the hair will not interfere with their sight at any time. Of course, it may also have something to do with their self-esteem!

The referee didn't expect Quaresma to make such an excuse, and was almost too angry to speak.

What the hell do you call a scarf a headband?

Then why don't you bring a gun to the field, according to your logic, it's not a gun, it's just a toy that can make noise when celebrating a goal

With a dark face, the referee did not intend to entangle with Quaresma any longer, he was really afraid that Quaresma would come up with some shocking theories for him.

"I don't care if it's a scarf or a headband, it's not allowed to be worn on stage!"

Quaresma shrugged, there is nothing you can do when you meet a referee who doesn't reason with you!

When a scholar meets a soldier, there is no reason to explain it!

Fortunately, I am still bald now, and my hair can also serve as insulation, otherwise my brain would be frozen to death.

Quaresma started the game, no matter what kind of rhetoric CSKA Moscow made before the game, for Quaresma, as long as he plays by himself, he will never let the game be left behind.

Even if this is Moscow's home court, even if the Russians have an obvious advantage here, Quaresma is here to take away a victory.

At the beginning of the game, the home team CSKA Moscow launched a fierce attack on the Arsenal position. That simple and fast style of play was particularly effective in the ice and snow.

The defensive players in the backcourt were slow to enter the state, and they were beaten for a while.

Quaresma was swimming near the midfield, running non-stop, he couldn't do without running, he froze after a while!

When Arsenal gradually adapted to the game environment and began to take the initiative, Quaresma also began to show off.

In the 20th minute of the first half, Quaresma cooperated tacitly with Clichy on the left, went into the ribs, and shot decisively. Moscow goalkeeper Akinfeev tried his best to save, but still failed to stop the ball from flying Goal and Arsenal are ahead.

And before CSKA Moscow recovered from the blow of losing the ball, Quaresma unreasonably stabbed them again, and the interval between before and after was less than 3 minutes.

If it is said that CSKA Moscow can still rescue a goal, then now, even if the ambulance arrives, their hearts have stopped beating!

Although the body still felt extremely cold, Quaresma's heart remained fiery all the time, and his state was so hot that it was about to explode.

Set a small goal first, such as 1 second to remember: Shukeju

Dear, click to enter and give a good review. The higher the score, the faster the update. It is said that those who gave the new full score found a beautiful wife in the end! The new version of the mobile station upgrade address:, data and bookmarks are synchronized with the computer station, no ads Fresh reading!