56 – The World Where He Disappeared (5)

In the end, Yulia couldn’t finish the academy safely and had to return to the imperial castle.

And he couldn’t live properly even in Hwangseong, so he lived secluded in his room.

It was the human perception system.

Even though she made a pact with her Ian at her wedding, she didn’t know what it meant until she really felt the effects.

But when she experienced the contract for the first time, she recognized again what it meant to her.

And once that pain, that moment, got stuck in her mind, now each and every trivial situation made her act cringe.

If even a little bit of an action that was not a problem caught my heart, the fear at that time came to mind in an instant.

And when the imprinted pain, fear, and momentary feeble guilt combined, the contract was eventually triggered, and Yulia had to feel the same pain helplessly again.

As time passed, the frequency with which the contract was triggered increased.

Actually, Yulia’s behavior wasn’t a problem, but from the moment she started recognizing the contract, she had no choice but to be careful in everything.

But rather, her cautious attitude itself was the factor that fueled her guilt, and that’s why she couldn’t get out of the bondage of her infinite pain.

In the end, she began to avoid even meeting people, let alone her academy life, and she had no choice but to start her secluded life.

Of course, that didn’t mean the contract wouldn’t activate.

Humans are thinking animals.

Just by being still, naturally, from time to time, thoughts like this and that came to mind, and Julia’s emotions also reacted to them.

And if there was a weak, even the slightest, emotion that would cause a contract, without fail, pain came, and then she had to struggle like that again without being able to resist.

I couldn’t even meet people. But being alone didn’t change anything.

There was nothing Yulia could do except helplessly lose her vitality day by day.

She felt terrible pain just thinking about him.

– Smart smart

I didn’t even care if someone knocked on the door.

Now, nearly four years after Yulia shut herself up in her room, no one bothered to visit her anymore.

The emperor also seemed to care about her at first, but the situation on the continent, which worsened day by day, left her with no improvement in her symptoms.

It was probably just mealtime.

It was only then that Julia’s door rang, and the attendant left food at her door every mealtime.

But now she didn’t even want to move.

He had no intention of eating, and he had no desire to eat any more.

She didn’t mean that she wanted to die, but that didn’t mean she wanted to live any longer.

Yulia’s mental power was at its limit.

It was normal for a normal person to go crazy. She seems to have been able to keep her sanity, yet she’s at least as good as her mental strength.

No, I don’t know if it would be good to describe this as normal.

“Yulia.”

“… ! Lorraine?”

Lorraine was looking down at her as if she had entered a gap while she was lying there, ignoring the sound of knocking in a daze again.

Her tightly closed door had already been opened wide with her magic.

“An asshole b*tch.”

Lorraine frowned at her and cursed at her as soon as he saw her lying in her emaciated state.

Yulia didn’t show any reaction.

She didn’t have any special feelings about that, and she knew better than anyone else that she was an asshole.

She honestly felt sorry for herself when she thought of the events of four years ago that came to her mind from time to time.

“What is it?”

No, actually, on the contrary, Yulia’s mind became a little clearer.

Before she started living in seclusion, she might have met someone who still had memories of when she was fine. She

She Or maybe it was because she was hit with the cool truth of her that she couldn’t even say to herself.

Rarely did her uneasy feelings flare up even when she remembered something from her past, and Yulia looked at Lorraine with her eyes, which had regained her light, albeit a little.

“A record of that day kept by the imperial family. Bring it.”

“… Record?”

“The last magic you used. I need to see some records of that magic.”

“It was a reverse summoning spell. Has he already returned to his own world?”

Her words came out so fluently that I couldn’t believe she hadn’t had any social interaction for four years.

Yulia herself was also surprised.

Lorraine, her Talking about her and her Ian, being able to have a normal conversation like this.

Maybe her contract with him, her cruel and sweet contract that she must love him all her life, was the only thing that could sustain her.

“I know. So show me I am the magic circle. Because it will reproduce the same.”

“… What?”

Lorraine’s words meant that she would bring back Ian, who had left for her own world.

I knew it was impossible, but if I did that, I would be able to get out of this pitiful situation.

She said that if she could see him again, if she could keep her contract with him and if she could live with him…

‘No, no… ? If he sees the man again, he will of course have to break the contract… ‘

Yulia shook her head in the delusion of reuniting with him in her moment.

She is the one who made herself this way. That she gave her heart to him was ridiculous.

But you shouldn’t hate him now. If that happens, the contract will activate again.

Thinking about him after a long time, and imagining the future of reuniting with him.

Yulia continued her words, trying to ignore the strange feeling that tickled her head.

“That is impossible. In the first place, even the masters of the mage tower couldn’t… “

“I can do it. So, just shut up and give me the data.”

“… “

Lorraine’s expression was also desperate.

It meant that she, too, was still tormented by her memories of her relationship with Ian.

Even though the form was slightly different from his own, living in the past was what they both had in common.

“… Take care of it I will speak to the imperial mages.”

Poof-

As soon as Yulia finished speaking, Lorraine left her seat without even looking back.

Yulia was not even impressed by her cold attitude.

She simply lifted her emaciated arm and wrote her short note and pushed it under her door.

Then she rang the bell.

Perhaps now the paper will be delivered to the imperial mages and the work will proceed.

What bothered her more than that was her conversation with Lorraine, and her memories of Ian from there.

She was the one who had intentionally avoided remembering him.

No matter what, it was Ian who cast such a terrible curse, and just thinking about him made it feel like the contract would activate.

However, the memory of him that came to her while talking to Lorraine did not harm her.

Of course, if I had a feeling of disgust thinking about Ian, the contract would have been activated, but I did not come to hate him automatically.

On the contrary, the feeling of being at ease. When she remembered his face, rather, her anxiety that had always dominated her seemed to fade.

“Ian… “

Yulia spat out his name for the first time.

It seemed that there had never been a case where he called his name like this, even when he was still in this world.

‘The 2nd Princess of the Empire. I, Julia, love only the warrior Ian for the rest of her life, and she swears that she will willingly sacrifice herself for him. If she breaks this and adopts a different mind, she will live in unbearable terrible physical and mental pain.’

And then the oath that came to mind.

She will love him forever. She must love him all her life.

That romantic but at the same time cruel sentence gave Julia a different resonance this time.

“Love… ?”

Did I actually love him? He thinks of him and strangely sees no pain coming.

Of course I don’t love him. Obviously it was.

But he seemed to love it. Do you love love? Do you love Ian?

“Ian… warrior… “

Do I have to devote my body and mind to him for the rest of my life? Should I love him that much?

Because the contract was like that in the first place. Is that the only way to get out of this pain?

-Yulia.

At that moment, he appeared from the corner of her room, smiling at her with her arms crossed.

“Hero… ?”

-Yulia.

She ran towards him as if possessed.

I didn’t want to see him. It’s not even that I love him.

But I had to. I had to catch the culprit behind all this.

“Ah… “

As she ran towards him, her eyes were filled with terrifying contempt.

But as she ran towards him, her mouth was smiling, forming her nasolabial folds in strange shapes.

Contradictory feelings. No, even calling it an emotion was bizarre.

Anyway, she ran towards him with that strangely strange expression on her face.

Thump!

But of course he didn’t exist.

She sprinted towards him and Yulia only thumped her head against the wall, and at that moment she regained her sanity after being strange for a moment.

“My, what am I… There is no reason for that human to exist here… “

It was quick to grasp the reality. She was not a weak person who could break so easily.

However, that momentary fantasy made me lose the logic and reason I was barely holding on to.

From noble mtl dot com

Momentarily, Julia’s anger toward him rose up, and at the same time, another terrible pain began.

“Kkeek… aaa

For a while, I was barely in control.

Her conversation with Lorraine made her think strangely for a moment, so she went back to square one again.

“Hyaaah-! hehehe… Hee hee hee hee hee… ! heheheaaa!!

However, the pain this time was different.

As usual, no, worse than usual, a pain that seemed to pierce the whole body.

However, in that terrible pain, Yulia was still smiling with a grotesque expression.

“Hikahahahaha-! Hiyahahahahahaaah-!!”

The existence of Ian, who has been forgotten.

The moment he rose to the surface of her mind again, her mind began to wander once again.

The terrible smile she was wearing in the midst of her pain showed that her life was about to face a major inflection point.

After that day, Yulia started to change again. She’s not good on one side.

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