A Book Dedicated to Our Youth

Chapter 3: The first years (2)

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A child who is only eleven or twelve years old seems to have been forgiven, and can be sent directly to prison for labor transformation. The students were stunned and stared at him, but it was not this series that made me stare. Crime, but the look of the boy on stage.

He is taller than his peers, because he looks thinner, and his blue school uniform hangs loosely on his body, and he keeps his head flat, because his hair is too hard, and the roots are upright. At a glance, he looks like a hedgehog. He stood lazily, lowering his head as if to admit his mistake, but occasionally when he looked up, his lips were smiling.

Did n’t he see everyone ’s eyes? Does n’t he feel ashamed? This is in front of the whole school! I can't understand anything.

After the meeting, the girls around were whispering, and I followed them, and I understood the ins and outs of the boy. He is at the same level as us, but because he stayed in the second grade, he is older than us. I heard that he is the youngest member of his family. He was only in his forties. He has four older sisters. He is said to be rich in his family. His sneakers are Nike. The watch on his wrist is Swatch was brought by his brother-in-law from abroad.

In the late 1980s and early 1990s, foreign countries were still a very remote term, what brand is what, what does this brand represent I do n’t understand, I just wondered, if you have money to steal things, blackmail others Money?

His behavior and his expression are like a mystery to me. Confused, I remembered the name of this bad student, Zhang Jun, but, I believe, it was not only me who remembered him that day.

In the fourth grade, the class was reclassified and two unfortunate things happened: the first one was that my math teacher was still Teacher Zhao; the second one was that she was not only a math teacher but also a class teacher.

Zhang Jun and I were assigned to the same class, but the two of us barely spoke. Although we have a lot in common, for example, he and I often take turns to take the countdown in the class; when we are in class, we do n’t listen, he always It was sleeping, and I was always in a daze, so we two were often smashed by Mr. Zhao ’s chalk head.

However, he is different from me in more places. Although he has poor grades, the boys in the class play with him, and even all the boys with poor grades listen to him, and the girls do not hate him, because he often invites them to eat ice cream, drink cold drinks, and jokes he tells , Can make them laugh forward and backward. During class, he was always sleeping, but as soon as the bell rang, he was full of energy, rushed to the playground with everyone, played football and basketball, and I always found a place by myself, hiding in a book, occasionally looking up Take a look at the girls jumping rubber bands and the boys playing football in the distance.

I ’m used to being lonely at home, anyway, I can read books, there are countless wonderful books; my sister is squeamish, likes to play small reports, I can avoid her, everything is "sister let sister"; Teacher Zhao is dissatisfied with me, after all It's just two or three minutes of torture in the math class. I can already bear it without expression.

If such days continue, then it is still a kind of calm. However, life always likes to tease us. When you are desperate, a spark of hope will show you, which will make you unable to give up; when you are calm, you will be turned around abruptly, so that you can't be too happy.

On a summer afternoon, one hour of free time between classes, students who do not need to be on duty all ran to the playground to play, because I like the sun on the window sill, I shrunk to sit on the window sill to read books and look into the distance .

At the end of the free time, when the classmates came back to study, Zhou Yun reported to Teacher Zhao that her pen was lost. She said in a grievance that this pen was bought for her by her father, and she used it before class. It is now gone. Teacher Zhao thinks that this matter is serious and must be dealt with seriously. He started asking students one by one, who was in the classroom during class activities.

Zhang Jun, the most suspected school bell, rang out of the classroom with a group of boys and played football on the playground. Countless people could testify. When Mr. Zhao asked him, he took out his schoolbag and put it on the table with great care, and said to Mr. Zhao: "You can search." Under his open confidence, Mr. Zhao immediately ruled out his suspicion.

Finally, when there were two or three other students in the classroom, Mr. Zhao pointed me out and asked me to hand over the pen. As long as I hand it over, I can forgive me this time!

I could n’t believe my ears. At that time, I was standing against the window, the sun was shining brightly on me, but I was cold all over.

Teacher Zhao criticized me strictly on the podium. The eyes of more than 30 students in the class all stared at me without blinking. Each pair of eyes was like a sword, and it hurt me.

I held back tears and said, "Mr. Zhao, I didn't ... didn't take her pen."

But Zhao did not believe that in her mind, the few students who stayed in the classroom, only me was a bad student, and only I could do such a bad thing. I am such a bad student. , But stayed in the classroom and said that he was reading a book, which was unbelievable and unreasonable.

She reprimanded me over and over and ordered me to hand over the stolen stolen goods, and I argued again and again that I did not steal.

The engineer of the human soul was annoyed, and made me stand on the podium, and then began to search my body from head to toe in front of my classmates. I only felt humiliated, and she let her tears fall on me Fumble around.

All the students in the class looked at me quietly on the podium. There was cruelty watching a good show in their eyes. They looked forward to the excitement at the moment when the stolen goods were seized. Teacher Zhao pushed me back and forth. In my blurred eyes, I saw a pair of strange and quiet eyes at the end of the classroom. There was no hidden expectation of excitement from others. There seemed to be sympathetic sympathy in the indifference. There is a little pity.

Teacher Zhao searched behind me, and then searched my desk and schoolbag, but no pen was found. Under embarrassment, the scolding against me grew louder.

No stolen goods could be found, she could n’t convict me, but she still warned me fiercely: “Do n’t think that you wo n’t be able to get through this time without catching you. You are a thief! It ’s a‘ three hands ’!”

I only felt cold and hot for a while, as if the words "thief" were printed deeply on my forehead with a hot iron. Facts have also proved that for a long period of time, these two words did indeed engrave on my forehead.

Teacher Zhao told the teachers that I stole things and did n’t admit it. The students also agreed that I stole things. When they mentioned me later, they no longer called my name, they called me "three hands." Some girls will even deliberately speak the three words in front of me in a low and low voice. I can only bow my head deeply in humiliation and walk away silently. They laughed exaggeratedly behind me.

Boys are not as mean as girls, they will not call me "three hands", but when they hear someone call "three hands", they look at me with a sharp sword.

For a long time, when I heard these three words, I wished I could die immediately and disappear in this world.

When I wake up in the morning, I will even be afraid. I am afraid of teachers and classmates. Going to school has become the most terrifying thing for me.

Who says "In the beginning of man, nature is good"? Have you ever seen a child cruelly kill a small animal? They can kill the birds alive. The animal nature is implied in human nature, and the child's world is actually cruel.

One month after the incident of stealing a pen, Teacher Zhao thoroughly trampled and humiliated me for the second time.

At that time, the class was doing self-study in the afternoon and the students were all doing their homework. Teacher Zhao corrected yesterday's homework on the podium and changed it. She suddenly called my name: "Luo Qiqi!"

I stood up in fear, thinking about whether my homework was all wrong, but I didn't expect her to sneer and say, "The sun is coming west, you haven't done anything wrong with your homework!"

My grades are not good, but that day, I do n’t know why all the math assignments were done right. When I want to come, doing the right assignment is always a good thing. Even if Teacher Zhao doesn't praise me, at least it shouldn't be scolded at all. My heart is lowered a bit, and I stand still with my head down.

She asked: "Whose homework did you copy?"

I looked up in amazement and froze for a while before answering: "I didn't copy homework."

Teacher Zhao asked me again two or three times, and I said "no". She became impatient and called me to the podium.

I walked one meter away from her, and stopped in fear, her feet couldn't move anymore. She grabbed me, grabbed me in front of her, and pointed my workbook with her finger. Can you do the right question? Can you do the right question? If you can do the right questions, then the sow can go to the tree. "

Several boys couldn't help laughing, and my face became hot, shy and angry, and shouted out loud for the first time: "I did it myself!"

In Teacher Zhao's mind, I have always been reticent and rebellious. She was stunned by my roar, and I was taken aback by myself.

After a moment, Teacher Zhao reacted and was angered even more. She clenched her fists and shoved my shoulders over and over again: "You say it again! Do you have the courage to say it again ?! You did it yourself What? It ’s okay to study poorly, it ’s just a problem with human intelligence, but you have even problems with moral character, you steal things, you lie, and your stomach is full of water. ”

Under her push, my body stumbled backwards, and when it was about to exceed the length of her arm, she pulled me back smoothly and started a new round of push: "You say it again! You Have the courage to say it again ?! It was n’t you who copied it ... "

I endured it silently, letting her insult constantly, like a chick in the hands of a child, I had no power to resist the torture that fate had imposed on my body. I could only follow her push, and my tiny body was crooked and slanted. oblique.

Below the rostrum are countless black heads raised, all kinds of eyes condensed on me, fear, indifference, contempt, sympathy ...

Suddenly, I do n’t know why, I think I ’m fed up, I ’m fed up completely! I met Teacher Zhao's eyes and said very loudly: "I didn't copy homework! I didn't copy homework!"

Teacher Zhao froze.

I actually challenged her authority in front of my classmates. She was already a grumpy woman. At this time, she was furious and frustrated. She picked up my homework and slammed it into my face. The other hand was still pushing me: " I have taught so many students, but I have never seen such a bad student! These assignments were not copied by you, my word "Zhao" is written backwards for you ... "

I was pushed back step by step until she clung to the blackboard, and she chased me. The whole world is oscillating. I only saw the white Huahua's workbook fanning over and past, and I clinged to the blackboard without any retreat, but I still shouted over and over again: "Just no copy! Just no copy! copy……"

My voice is getting louder and louder, and it has turned into a scream of exhaustion.

In the end, my workbook was shattered, the paper was scattered and floated on the podium. Teacher Zhao had no tools for beating and had to stop. I still stared at Teacher Zhao stubbornly and shouted again and again: "I just didn't copy! Just didn't copy ..."

My thoughts were crazy at that time, you fight! In addition to relying on you as a teacher to beat me, what else can you do? If you have the courage, it is best to kill me here today!

I don't know if Teacher Zhao saw my madness in my eyes, anyway she stopped attacking. After standing on the podium for a while, Teacher Zhao said viciously: "I can't teach you a child like you! I will call your parents!"

Very strange feeling, although her expression is as harsh as ever, but I just feel her inner lashes, at that moment, I have been afraid of her all but nothing, and some just disdain, I sorted out my own Hair, snorted coldly: "Please, please! Does Mr. Zhao know my father's phone number? I don't know if you can ask me!" After that, before she could speak, she walked off the podium, walked back to her seat, and started ping-pong. Packing things on the table tennis, after packing up the schoolbags, he turned his shoulders back and left the classroom with a big swing.

The classmates all looked at me with dumbfounded eyes. This time, instead of lowering their heads and avoiding their gaze as before, I walked and stared back coldly one by one. Look! Don't you like it very much? Then I will let you see clearly and see enough! When the students saw my eyes sweeping towards them, they evaded one after another, but Zhang Jun didn't avoid my eyes. He leaned back on the chair, turned the pen in his hand leisurely, looked at me quietly, the corner of his mouth Seems to be non-curved.

When I walked out of the classroom, I was fearless, but when I really escaped from the school that gave me countless humiliations, I was dazed. The adults are at work, the children are at school, and the streets are deserted. Where can I go?

I was carrying my schoolbag, walking sadly and confused, passing a few game rooms. I know there is a place strictly prohibited by teachers and parents. The people gathered inside are “little bastards” in the eyes of their parents, “ground ruffians” in the mouth of their teachers, and “triads” in the mouth of their classmates. I used to avoid them, but today , My courage seems infinite, I want to see.

I picked one of the largest game machine rooms and walked in. The room was filled with a strong smell of smoke. Many boys were lying in front of the game machine and playing fiercely. Judging from their ages, they were probably from junior high school students to high school students, and there were very few elementary school students . They were very focused. It was strange to see a girl walking into the game room, but it was just a glance up, and she concentrated on her game.

In an instant, I fell in love with this smokeless place, because here, no one looked at me with all kinds of eyes.

The video games more than a decade ago were relatively simple. They were nothing more than simple human-machine games such as playing airplanes, going into labyrinths, and killing monsters. I stood on the side and watched them for a long time. I jumped up and down to kill people, and felt bored. When I heard someone cheering in the courtyard, I followed the voice and walked out of the side door.

There are two pool tables in the empty yard. A pool table was full of people. The onlookers were all nervous and excited. Later I learned that it was gambling. In the other picture, there are only two players and one watcher.

In order to solicit business, other billiard tables are placed in front of the store, but this billiard table is hidden in the store. I didn't even think about it. I stood next to the pool table with few people and looked at it. One of the players leaned over and pointed at the center of the ball with a pole. He smiled and said to the person watching the ball next to him: "The business is so good that even the pupils are carrying their schoolbags to patronize."

Another person who had just hit a stroke noticed that there was a person standing next to him, and he glanced up and down at me, saying, "Little sister, it's time to go to school, it's time to go home, or your parents will find you Truant. "

He was quite tall and could not see his age. Although his mouth was slippery, his expression was not frivolous. I also took dynamite that day, regardless of the good intentions of others, anyway, the export is choking people: "Who is your sister? If you are myopic, go with a pair of glasses."

All three turned to stare at me. The other player just wanted to talk, but he shrugged his shoulders and said to his companion: "Don't be serious with children!" , Aim, shot, a beautiful bottom goal. He straightened up, put the club on his shoulders, looking for the next drop point, and smiling at me, seeming to ask: "Can this be done by myopia?"

The man in his twenties standing at the pool table watching the ball, he bent down to pick up the beer on the ground, I saw the tattoo on him suddenly felt uneasy, and turned around and walked away without a word .

I thought Teacher Zhao would complain badly to his parents, and my parents would repair me well, but when I got home, my father just gave me the assignments for the day and asked me to do it again. , Let me go to dinner without saying anything. After eating, the two of them whispered in the bedroom for a long time, presumably discussing how to deal with me.

Before going to bed at night, my mother said softly: "No matter what the cause of the matter is, it is wrong for you to hit the teacher in the face. When you go to school tomorrow, I apologize to Teacher Zhao. Also, this pen was bought by your father when he went to Beijing. Yes, I ’ll give it to you now. I want to tell my parents what I want in the future. "

I know that Teacher Zhao also told my parents about the incident I stole the pen from last time, but my mother did n’t know whether to take care of my self-esteem or what, even if I did n’t ask a word, I was too lazy to say that I lay down after pulling the quilt, mother I want to say a few words. My sister shouted "Mom" in the bathroom. The mother immediately got up, put the pen on the desk, and hurried out.

I listened to the laughter from the bathroom and covered my head with a quilt. When I was abused and beaten by Teacher Zhao during the day, I did not shed tears, but I did not know why at this moment, and the tears shed. If my grandfather is present, will he be very distressed to me, and will he tell Teacher Zhao with certainty that "Qiqi will never steal other people's things", can I cry in his arms?

3

I became a four-eyed panda

I hate that teacher, so I didn't learn his class and got poor grades. Who did this retaliate to?

The rebellion of the child may be ridiculous and childish in the eyes of adults, but that is the only way we know.

Although my mother told me to apologize to Teacher Zhao, but I did not go, I have no apologies for this vicious old witch.

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